Mr. X

Why am I thinking of you now
When you belong to yesterday?
A time long past,
A bond that didn't last.
I can't help but wonder
For a long time I pondered...
But thinking only led to confusion.
I must stop this illusion
That you're still here
Waiting for me
To wake up and face reality.
Who knows if your heart has somebody -
Somebody who isn't me,
Somebody new to love and care about
Somebody to share your deepest feelings with.
I remember when I was that somebody -
You were always there for me
Though I'm not exactly the same for you.
I took you for granted,
Played my game...
I thought you'll always be the same -
Loving, supporting, waiting for me.
I continued to bend you
Till finally, you broke...
Went away and left me alone.
I can understand the anguish you felt
And may be feeling till now.
I'm really sorry.
I didn't mean to hurt you so much.
I cared for you truly
Though back then I never understood it fully.
Now I realize
High is the price
Of ever letting you go.
Now I know
That I miss you so.
But does it still matter?
I don't even know where you are now!
But I hope someday
If our paths cross in some way
You'll talk to me
And accept my apology.
Even if you can't once more love me...
At least, please forgive me.

© 1999